“I MUST LEAVE A COMMENT ON THE INTERNET!”
The scariest part of the internet has to be the comments following any news story.
Here is the inevitable breakdown of the comments you’ll find after any article posted to a news site:
1. Someone will ask, “Why is this news?” Meanwhile, he read the whole story, which pretty much answers his question.
2. Someone will point out a misplaced semicolon and make a sarcastic remark about the site’s inability to get everything perfect – because, you know, the “semicolon cop” never makes a mistake on his job, and the proliferation of a deadly plague or whatever is far less important than his vast knowledge of grammar.
3. Someone will make a political comment about the story, even if it has absolutely nothing to do with politics. Somehow, an article about the best way to frost a cake will be turned into a debate over healthcare or guns or the latest war.
4. Did I say “debate”? Actually, the thread will quickly deteriorate into a bunch of juvenile insults revealing the real problem with democracy – too many selfish, ignorant imbeciles.
There are lots of angry people out there using internet message boards to express the epic failure of their small lives. Would they say any of these things to an opponent’s face? Probably not. But it’s so easy to be a tough guy when you’re hiding behind your computer screen, and it’s so easy to be a snide, smirking spectator who laughs along with it.