Category Archives: stuff in the news

RONNIE JAMES DIO

Posted on May 18, 2010 by happyjoe

Didn’t I just write a eulogy for Malcom McClaren? And now I have to write one about Ronnie James Dio, who I never even listened to? Jill ate dinner at Dio’s house. Well, it was his mother’s house. I forget … Continue reading →

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Winter Olympics

Posted on February 22, 2010 by happyjoe

So Larry was telling me one of his web sites was hacked a few years ago and he lost all his data. This is a tragic story that makes me realize exactly how much people suck. Actually, I already realized … Continue reading →

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Computer Cars

Posted on February 4, 2010 by happyjoe

New cars are more and more dependent on computers to run properly. Now I don’t want to sound like some old guy sitting in a rocking chair, chewing on a pair of plastic teeth—but do we really need to wire … Continue reading →

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Study Of Reality

Posted on November 20, 2009 by happyjoe

The Nestle Research Center in Switzerland just completed a study, and the results clearly show that eating a quantity of dark chocolate every day reduces stress. Of course, Nestle is a chocolate company—but I’m sure the data isn’t biased. Kind … Continue reading →

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Stick It In

Posted on October 12, 2009 by happyjoe

“Should I get this new vaccine?” “No. It will make you sick.” “I thought it was supposed to prevent me from getting sick.” “That idea is an evil conspiracy. If you get a flu vaccine, you will get the flu.” … Continue reading →

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BOMBING THE MOON

Posted on October 9, 2009 by happyjoe

NASA is bombing the moon today. I guess we want to make the moon more like the earth. The earth is full of falling bombs. Okay—we’re not actually dropping bombs. We’re slamming a pair of spaceships into the moon in … Continue reading →

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Al Capone

Posted on October 8, 2009 by happyjoe

A house supposedly used as a hideout by gangster Al Capone is up for sale. It’s a two-story stone lodge in Couderay, Wisconsin, and it sits on 407 acres of land. The property is in foreclosure, and it can be … Continue reading →

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Stonehenge

Posted on October 7, 2009 by happyjoe

Scientists have discovered another circle of stones near Stonehenge. Apparently, this is a very big deal. In fact, University of Bristol archaeologist Joshua Pollard has described the new find as “incredible.” I know just how he feels; I always get … Continue reading →

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Interview With A Dollar Bill

Posted on August 18, 2009 by happyjoe

A new study shows that 90% of U.S. currency contains traces of cocaine. I thought I’d interview a dollar bill and see what he had to say for himself. My questions are in bold black. His responses are in a … Continue reading →

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Les Paul

Posted on August 15, 2009 by happyjoe

Les Paul died. Les created the Gibson Les Paul guitar. Les also invented multi-track recording, an achievement that cannot be overstated. Thanks to Les Paul’s invention, musicians could suddenly screw up quite a bit and still sound great. Nowadays, of … Continue reading →

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